De-Fat Thoughts, aka - So, What Is You Gon' Do?

Chatting with one of my good friends today reminded me of just how many of us are very aware of things we need to do..and our reluctance to do them.  We shared some stories of our personal journeys towards health and vitality, then we joked at how other people really need to follow suit.  Neither of us were trying to insinuate that we are better than anyone or trying to join the Body Police.  It's just that when we listen to what other people want, they (and we) know the answers to the issues...they just don't want to DO them.

For example, he told me that many people he knew worked out regularly and often, but turned their noses up at the notion of veggies.  They also ate any and everything that fast food had to offer.  I know people who do the same thing.  In each case, it seems as if all that working out is being sabotaged by poor eating habits.  Not the occasional ice cream or hot wing night...frequent bad choices.

NOW, I don't proclaim to be anybody's damn guru.  However, in the midst of my journey, I've learned some very sensible things.  If I eat well and exercise, my body changes for the better.  That's a simple ass concept.  When I eat bad and miss my workout, I feel crappy.  That too, is a simple ass concept.  Since April of this year, I've been on this road...and except for my Evil BitchFoot, I feel so much better after a walk or workout.  On those "eff it" days, my workout suffers when I have poisons in my body.  My mood sucks too.

Which takes me back to that thing in which you know what you NEED to do..but when will you DO them...

Speaking for myself, I had a real "What in the Blue Hell" moment when I found out my weight in April.  I told my partner that I was so shocked that I was in a fit of hysterical laughter for 48 hours.  I subtracted my November 2005 weight (my smallest adult weight) from the April 2012 weight and I think I got a car note.  Maybe a car note for a Daewoo, but that shit was ATROCIOUS!

But my dears and sirs, I knew I was fat before that day in April.  I didn't have to look at a scale...I could look in the mirror and see what the deal was right then.  When stuff that was loose became unjustly fitted...when I had a muffin top...when I got winded doing minor shit...I KNEW what the deal was.  I went from Judo to Judon't.  In that range from November '05 to April '12, I always knew I was fat.  On that airplane to Vegas in 2010...I knew.  But I wasn't ready to do anything at that time.

April 11, 2012 was that punch in the mouf I needed to get my ass out the sling.  I was talking to myself in the whip and I kept reciting the number...not the current weight...but I kept saying "over a hunnerd...over a hunnerd..." like I was borderline "Girl, Interrupted".  I kept laughing at the fact that I let myself go "over a hunnerd"..

Yall think I'm playing...I think a vein found its way out of my neckfat that day.

About 48 hours later, I said "so, what is you gon' do?"

At which point, I wiped up the drool from my bathroom counter and began a plan of action in my head.  Mainly because if you note where I was at that time, I didn't have a pen & paper handy.  I decided that day..that I wanted to change that repetitive "over a hunnerd.." down to "under a hunnerd..." then to "bitch, you're BACK".  I didn't know much, but I knew I needed to be moving.  I went to the make-like gym at work and pedaled until I couldn't walk.  I reached out to fokes on Facebook for ideas and help and then I managed to get in touch with Gene Williams by way of his wife Rachel.  He worked with me to find exercises I could do without putting too much on my feet.  I did my homework about eating.  I asked those who've been on a similar journey.  In short...I answered my question with action.

I'm aware that many people haven't had that "so, what is you gon' do" moment yet.  Not everyone's moment comes when others think that it should come.  That doctor visit in which you find out you have Hypertension may not be that punch in the mouf..but seeing a person smaller than you fall suddenly ill from a relatively preventable illness may be.  Being at your heaviest weight may not be the trigger, but realizing that you no longer fit clothes that you need (for work, church, etc) may be.  Hell, it could be a picture.  But when you finally reach that point, nothing or nobody will be able to stop you from answering with an action.

Jumping back like 15 paragraphs, our friends may not have had their "so, what is you gon' do" episodes.  Right now, eating junk, scoffing at veggies, and being sedentary is fine.  As I told someone else, seeing me as the Cautionary Whale gives some people a sense of invincibility.  Since they're not MY size, they don't have anything to worry about.  When I go walking, they tell themselves that's what I NEED to do...not them...because they aren't fat.  As long as their ankles aren't swollen, stomachs aren't doing a Dap Dunlap or their heads aren't swimming...they're fine. 

However, when you reach your breaking point and ask "so, what is you gon' do"...nothing will stand in your way.  Nothing.

Not even a whole person.  Or several.


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