EarthWindFire82 of Memphis

The last hour or two has been some ol' bull. Sometimes, I have to take to the blog to hash out my feelings.  Hell, I downloaded the Blogger Android app for this one! Shoot. One of my bigger battles this last two months has been with my brain. Ol' girl is still making me see myself as 411 pounds. I look at myself and constantly worry if I'm not small enough. It's as if losing 160 pounds is nothing. My logical side knows that losing a whole human is the business. But that low down ass brain says "you're still fat". Even as I've acquired an entirely new wardrobe, I still see Big Ol' Tam. The fact that my brain has been seeing the Tam from 2012 and earlier is also why I flip flop between "I can't wait to go and have fun" and "stay yo fat ass in the house". I knew that making such a big change would require mental adjustment. That meant that I would have to see food as nutrition instead of therapy. That also meant that I would...

I'm not going to be before you long... I know those are famous last words from a many a COGIC pastor...lmao!  But I was just thinking about something vexing my little soul. People really don't know what they are worth anymore.  They think that they have to just take whatever you throw at them..like they are some starved out dogs.  I remember being that way some years ago myself.  I didn't know my value...what I really deserved...and I always had someone who felt that same way about me.  When I say "felt that same way about me", I mean that they knew I didn't know what I deserved...so they didn't apply themselves. If I thought I was worthy of only getting one phone call per week, they didn't bother to call me twice a week.  I didn't think I deserved a wonderful night on the town, so I took the little Chinese food date at my humble abode.  Again I stress, damaged people attract damaged people ...so that's what I always got.  Even though...

As you can see by the title, I am a Fat Chick. Lately, the web connected me with other fat chicks who are unapologetically so.  Tumblr really brought many of them to my attention, and they added a fuel to what had been a spark.  I saw big girls who didn't give a rat's ass about what you thought of them.  They didn't hesitate to wear what they desired and they were a force to be reckoned with.  They scream "Fuck Flattering" and reject the girdles and they don't mind posing in their natural splendor, rolls and all.  I can't deny that I admire them all.  I love reading the blogs and posts about how they are proud to be who and how they are and how others need to back down. I really cosign to a lot of their perspectives as a fat chick...mainly because my physical size should not be a gauge to determine how well or poorly you treat me.  These beautiful women didn't ask for respect, they took it.  Like I take the last sample of sexy chicken at Sam's...