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Showing posts from April, 2011

Good Friday Comedy...aka-The Plight of the Conchord

So, I had a lot of funny stuff to happen this week in my plight of slowly de-fatting myself. I reckons I'll share. I had a few moments of freedom at work and I decided that since I haven't had time to work out, I would do that thing where I just have fast breaks of extra movement. You know, since I can't go outside and walk the track, I would powerwalk around the floor. Seeing as I'm often perch-ed at my desk, I assumed some movement was better than none. I took the scenic route to the ice machine. I picked up the pace coming in and out of work. Just anything. So, one day, I decided to hoof it out of work. Something about these Reebok Zigtechs that makes me forget I'm fat. Your girl, straight BALLED OUT! I mean, I was running for the first time since I last went to the Mid-South Fair! I didn't even fall! Suddenly, a man was running with me. I said, "burning calories too"? He said "no, I was about to ask what happened"? I blinked.

T.E.N. Musical Equilibrium..or Lack Thereof

Beyonce's new song sucks to me. Sorry. I don't mean to alienate my gays. But I took a listen to "Girls (Who Run the World)" and I was like, it would be a good song if she wasn't singing. Like, if a SWAC band was playing the song while the gays and Jaycettes dance. Listen to it...(http://www.popeater.com/2011/04/19/beyonce-girls-who-run-the-world/) See? I almost caught an epilepsy. You can't play that shit in the club! On a side note, I really hate that music has fainted like this. Anytime a person could come up with this high rooty-pootery and it float just because you are a big name..the industry is dead! I could hit her in the mouf with a houseshoe for this song. It was so bad, I been purging my brain with Earth Wind & Fire, Prince, Phyllis Hyman and Pharoah Sanders! Oh man. I am so mad! I am only 28 but I know that if we don't get some real artists out here soon to put together a track that isn't over-produced Tom Foolery soon, I

Some #RichyShit

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Is We Growing Down?

First of all, where are the following people: Dru Down? MC Eiht? Positive K? Your Daddy? So anyways, I am uber hyper today, and I keep feeling like if I don't watch myself, I'm going to cut a damn cartwheel. I have to remind myself that I am fat so I won't jump off of anything. *cues Go Go Gadget Gospel* Well, I was wondering if people get to a certain age and grow down. I have never encountered so many immature people in my life. I don't know if it's a subconscious desire not to be a responsible adult or just adult-onset bitchdom. In the short time we've been in 2011, I have discovered that fokes are acting extra tasty crispy. Nobody wants to take responsibility for their actions. Nobody wants to be ambitious. Why is we not taking care of your damn kids? PULL YO GOTDAMN PANTS UP! Why is you always gossipin'? **sidebar, not the GOOD gossip either** Are people afraid to be adults? Must we remain in a perpetual state of schoolyard? Can men be men and wome

Saddle Shoes & Back in the Groove

I meant what I said yesterday. I still wonder where the punchline is. Like, when is someone going to tell me that this is a major joke and it's going to get better soon. You know, like...where is Amy Grant to come out with the happy people and the dude dressed like Spiderman to say "little birdie, you're free cuz he paid the price". That's what happens when I take Tylenol PM too early. Sooo yeah, last night, I sat up and thought. I had no choice because I was up front with CJ and he hides remotes. I let something get to me that had never gotten to me before. At age 28.781, I allowed something that has affected me from birth finally get me down. Something that I had cracked jokes about, hid quite well and even ignored...had broken my spirit. After tearing up, I had to ask myself why it bothered me this time. What about this last month made me so upset. I realized why...because I actually started to pity myself. Tamara...pitied herself. I am the bouncy, bubbly

The Life That Is Mine..

I demand a recount. Somebody thought it would be mad funny for me to be born this way. You know...THIS way, with this janky ass genetic condition that has affected my life. I know someone is going to go off into a tangent about how people's lives are worse than mine and that I should be thankful that I can "hide" my condition. CJ & I can still live normal lives and no one ever know something's "afoot". But I can't hide mine like CJ could. Every aspect of my life is affected by it. A few podiatrists and orthopedic surgeons figured they'd be helping me by cutting and moving shit so I could have a better quality of life. Life is so improved that I'm a fatass, legally handicapped chick who can't even dress up because she can't find shoes. Wait for the leap for joy. When we took CJ to Campbell Clinic, I was overjoyed to hear that he was doing well and that the doctor was going to avoid surgery at all costs and my feet were the reason