It's Liberation, Baby

The very first line of this song says "I'm in heaven"...

And I think that's where I have been for a good minute. Right now as I'm writing this, I can't stop thinking about him. I find myself thinking about him in one way or another at every turn. I'm not obsessed or anything, but I'm still getting accustomed to being like I am right now. I'm free...liberated even.

(Can't worry bout what another nigga thank...)

This is a feeling that is new to me. I am free to feel and be how I so desire. I don't have to keep the walls up anymore. I don't have to be afraid to reach out to him and I damn sure don't have to hold back anything I think or feel. To some, this has never been a problem. For me, it's easier to tell someone to go to hell than it is to tell them my feelings. I was a hardass. I mean, it had been safer to be that way than to be hurt. When I had Lex, the wall got higher and stronger because I didn't want my daughter to see her mom upset over some man.

I didn't think that I was ever going to be able to let anyone into my life, let alone my heart without being afraid that he was going to get too close to me. So needless to say, I'm shocked that I am at the way I am now.

***sidebar...remember that song from "I'm Gonna Get You Sucka" when Jack was about to get it on with Cheryl?***

I can say with a true sincerity that I love him. It's a weird and new feeling for me to love someone like I love Chris. I was with someone before for nearly three years of my life and the love I had for him is nothing like this. I'm comfortable and I feel good knowing that he wouldn't do anything to betray the trust and love I have for him. When I am with him, I am happy. Period. When we don't get to see each other, I can't wait until the next time I get to see him.

**damn, I know how you feel Maurice**

I could go on and on about why I love him, but that's something that I rather him hear directly from me. Just know that the hardass in me has left the building. I don't know what God has in store for us, but I hope it's longevity and happiness. Now I know what Keri Hilson meant when she said "this wasn't supposed to happen to me".

I didn't know I could love someone like this and let myself go...


JodeMyJode said…
Isnt that fuckin' sweet!? AWWWWWWWWWWW gotta love that shit! *irritated you beat me to my mushy confession of love* LMAO

Well I love that you love and get love in return! Tis a Beautiful thing!
EarthWindFire82 said…
Yes it is! I am sitting over here feeling loved and hungry right now! LMAO!

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