EarthWindFire82 of Memphis

HEY! It's not last year no more! So that means, for at least a few of you, that you're doing something different than you were last week. For others, you're likely practicing the fine art of insanity and awaiting a change. Whatever floats your boat or finds your lost remote, sons. Well, I decided to helps myself to being honest about a few things. As usual, there's no need to try figuring out who is what or trying to see who "needs to read this", just bask in my honesty and fix me some chicken. 1. Let's leave the relationship drama behind. All that back and forth goings on amongst adults is tiring. Instead of joining the "On & Off" club, leave the light off. Yeah, I said it. I have heard people say that "well, we have worked out our issues and all is well". I strongly doubt that is factual. In many cases, one party (or both) is going to make whatever temporary changes necessary to get that person back. When you think ...

So many of yall are aboot to flood my Twitter timeline and Facebook home page with a bunch of impending failures for 2011. Yeah, I said it...impending failures. Most of you know these as "New Year's Resolutions". These are often shat upon before it warms up outside, and they really are hilarious. In most cases, the person making the resolution is so serious about this year's change that you almost think they'll make it to Easter...but they don't. Allow me to share with you some common resolutions and my thoughts. Maybe through this program you'll see where you went wrong in choosing your resolution and how you can avoid failure...or at least delay failure to Summer 2011. *The Weight Loss Resolution* This is one of the most common resolutions in history. They are made by so many people that King Jesus doesn't even hold this against you as a lie. He knows that you really thought you'd workout this year, so he gives you a mulligan. After having...

Are you tired of traditional four year colleges taking all of your money and leaving you with nothing more than a piece of paper and major debt? Are you sick of all the "Adult Learning Programs" that really DON'T work with your life? Do you want to play sports other than the ones the NCAA regulate to the point of boredom? Well me too dammit! This is why we have the new addition to the LeMoyne Owen College area...The University of Tennemissitucky! Founded in this year, Tennemissitucky is soon to be the newest thorn in the side of the Tennessee Board of Regents..that is if they find out about us in time. The mission of our school is simple: do whatever the hell you want, pay us, then subsequently get the hell out. We don't hold you to unnecessary standards such as "Core Classes" that expire in a few years. Funny how your courses expire...but the student loan debt doesn't... To hell with all that. Here at the U, we cuts to the chase. You majoring...

Unfortunately, the fokes who need to learn from this note won't see it. They've most likely deleted their pages. Then again, this is a general reminder of how the truth is the best thing, but nobody wants to hear it. It's nothing new to those with common sense, but every now and then, there is a need for a refresher course. ***Facebook Statuses*** Nobody gives two shits about your problems with another woman. I don't mean those legitimate statuses where we talk about our friends or joke about something we saw. I mean those statuses along the lines of "I TOLD THAT BITCH SHEEN FUKKIN WIT NO ROOKIE" and "IF YOU THINK YOU GETTIN MY MAN YOU BETTER REKKANIZE". Most likely, she has already succeeded in her endeavor. I don't really think the sensible Facebook crowd cares. Besides, that ain't sexy after age 19. By age 20, you should already recognize if another woman is with "your man" and fire them both accordingly. After all, you w...

First of all, that may NOT be catfish for sale for $3.49 at the Farmer's Market on Kirby Parkway & Winchester. It's good as hell, but it may not be catfish. If you know what it is then let me know...I mean, at least put a label on that for the kid. ANYHOO! Here's a quick mental pimp slap for the masses. As the title implies, this has to do with apologies. Chicago & Az Yet said it's hard to say "I'm Sorry", but it really isn't. As a matter of fact, it's SO easy that people have taken power from the phrase. Remember when we were coming up, we were taught to apologize for what we did wrong? Like, if we sprung on someone, and got in trouble, we were often made to say "I'm sorry". Even those of us with offspring have made our own apologize for disrespecting someone. In short, that phrase is used about as often as "thank you" and "go to hell". So, with that being said, it has lost its power. Now, we say w...

Good afternoon Fokes, Fam & PHAm! I got a little space to run my mouth and ponitificate, so I think I will! I won't be before you long, but I had to share some of my opinions yet again. As you can tell by the title, I got a little bit to say about the people of our great country. I welcome your opinions and comments as always, and I also want ignorance to stay the hell out my house...as there is no place for such in this joint. Our great country is full of people. People of different races, creeds, colors and religions. Also various disabilities, abilities, mentalities and educational backgrounds. In short, there is no one description for the people of the United States of America. You can look at some people in other countries and narrow down the options of where they originate, or their ancestors at the very least. However, you can't exactly point out a person before they open their mouths and say that person is from the United States (or at least I reckon you c...

WHY DID E*TRADE SETTLE WITH THAT CRACKHEADEDNESS EXTRAORDINAIRE? Oh, good afternoon. It was a hunnerd damn degrees today, so I felt the need to act a plum donkey. But, step away from using Axe to scrub your balls and listen as I share some stuff I learned on the interwebs. As I opened, I was telling you guys that E*Trade actually settled with Lindsay Blow-han about the "Milkaholic" thing. Of course, they won't tell us how much crack they bought her in the settlement, but TMZ says that her team is "very happy". Welp, the lawsuit itself was for $100 MEELION dollars. We all know that David Ruffin got a gang of dope for a Lincoln Towncar and expired tickets, so ain't no telling what all ol' girl is going to buy. Oh...that is if she doesn't end up back in jail because she got a little warrant-poo out for her arrest for failing more drug tests. Someone tell her to stop letting Flynn buy her crack.. Paris Hilton kinda admitted in a way that "...