The 8/23 De-Fat Post, aka-Obsessed (Not Bunny Boiling Nuts, Doe)

Goal #2 is on its way to being reached.  As of now, I'm 36.4 pounds down since late April and that is by no means lightweight.

I said "lightweight".

N-E-Hoo...I'm having some serious head pains from a juice fast gone awry and it kind of made me low.  Combined with the irritation of my bitchfoot, and you have someone who is frustrated as hell.  I'm sure the pain isn't helping, but it really is there.

I'm starting to get obsess-ed now.  All of these doctor visits involve scales, and everytime I see the number, I  get to calculating.  I was down four tenths of a pound in four days and I actually got pissed.  Chris reminded me that we had an unusual eating weekend with CJ's party, and I didn't juice that weekend either.  My nutritionist said that as long as the scale keeps going down, all is well.  She commended me on my continued success.  All the while...I was like "Tamara is Not Impressed".

I thought about the last two months and I realize that I've gotten super obsessed.  I find myself humping harder the day I feel as if I ate too much.  I drink a gang of water anyways, but I tend to feel sick to my stomach if the day has gone by and I'm not at the amount of water as I want.  I'm not an uber-Jock or a Food Nazi, but I can't eat or drink anything without this feeling of damn dread.

I wonder if it's normal or if I'm just nuts.

I might be nuts.  I am fine if I am just nuts.  I know fokes who are nuts and they enjoy life.

But for it normal to be this hung up during the weight loss process?




A Very Prplgrl said…
I think it is completely normal to feel that way, but you can't give in to it. You know you are doing what you can. that's all you can do. I <3 you and am very proud of you. You've done what I haven't been able to commit too. that's something right there. :) just because the progress isn't going the way YOU planned it, it's still progress and that has to override the obsessiveness.
A Very Prplgrl said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
A Very Prplgrl said…
Oh and I completely LOVE the pics attached for emotional emphasis.. ROFL that is great...
EarthWindFire82 said…
LMAO!!! Thanks lady. I think it's true when they say you're your biggest critic. I still can't see where any of this weight has gone, but I can feel it. I guess there's a part of me that kinda read too many "abnormal success blogs" and began thinking that MY progress was slow...when it is likely the way it's supposed to be.

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