T.E.N. Snippets for March 13, 2009

I still ain't got no Wii-placement for my pilfered system.

At any rate, here are a few bits to entertain yoself. Today's report is brought to you today by me, myself and I. Chuck Norris also sponsored this report, so it's going to explode after he roundhouse kicks me.

*I'd like to begin by saying that whooping ass must be in style seeing as Bebe Winans got in trouble for cutting a shine on his ex-wife. I'm going to leave that at the end of the 20 foot pole because I ain't touching it...BUT I gots a mugshot from the web!









*The daughter of America's least favorite second place winner is now single. Bristol Palin and Levi "I Rather Go Muddin' Than Wear a Suit" Johnston are no longer engaged! As for the reason behind all the mess, it is stated that this was an amicable split. Amicable my ass, I called this eons ago and said that they weren't getting hitched if Ms. Sairy lost the VP spot...









*Everyone's second favorite weedsmoker Cheech Marin is engaged. GEET it Cheech!









*New pic of Dru Hill. Laugh. You know you want to.









*I know this is late, but did anyone notice that the Oscars left out Eartha Kitt in the memorial? Did they not know she was gone to Glory? I hope the Academy Award crew gets haunted by hearing "Mahhhhh-cuss" in their sleep forever. Pull the levah...

WRONG LEVAHHHHHH....









*Izzie Stevens ain't right.

***IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN GREY'S YET THEN DON'T LOOK***

The interns have diagnosed her with Stage IV skin cancer that has metastized to her brain and such. 5% chance of survival. She told Cristina because she had to let it out. As to how it's going to go, only Shonda Rhimes knows. Well, that and the dude from Entertainment Weekly.









*A poster for Quentin Tarantino's next movie "Inglorious Basterds". I spelled it the way it's supposed to go. As for the explanation of the bat and such, this movie stars Brad Pitt and is narrated by Samuel L. Jackson about some soldiers killing Nazis. I don't mean shooting them either. Apparently, Brad's character said he wanted 100 Nazi scalps and sometime down the line of the trailer shows someone aboot to go upside someone's head with said bat.

OOH!









*Miley Cyrus said she couldn't move with her 20 year old boyfriend quite yet because she'd go crazy. Nothing about the whole thing about her being 16 years old. Um, we needn't be too grown Mija...









*TP for 15 bungholes...Octopussy, aka-Nadya Suleman got her new house TP-ed and she ain't even moved in it yet! I'm going to be saying "I need TP for my bunghole" all damned day!!!









*Annnnnd Mickey Rourke and Scarlett Johannsen are in "Iron Man II". That should be splendiforous!









Well, that's all I got. It's kind of slow this week.

BYE!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Why I Decided On Surgery..De-Fat Posting

Image
Okay so this is going to be one of those posts that will result in somebody being butthurt.  I have no earthly idea why because it means said butthurt soul would be that way for something unrelated to them. Yes, I have had Gastric Bypass Surgery...and no, I do not regret it one bit.  I also don't think it's up to anyone to tell me the following (in a completely unsolicited manner): *Who had it and regretted it *Who had it and had a gang of wrinkles, extra skin or whatnot *What they think of people who have weight loss surgery Why? Because... Yes, these memes help me be a snarky bastard yet keep the mood light. Before I go any further, I am not a jerque.  I am not someone who walks around with a perpetual attitude and my nose turned up at everyone.  I don't have disdain for people's opinions and I do accept that I am not the only person in the world.  I can discuss things and be okay if you don't roll with me.  But what
Read more

Depressed, Compressed, Oppressed, Suppressed, Damn Pressed.

I been battling depression the last month, yall. I haven't really had any motivation. I've spent the last thuddy days aggressively applying for job after job. I only got on my computer for applying. I've tried everything from receptionist to material handler and nothing has worked. I found myself getting angry. I began getting offended. I channeled my David Ruffin a la Temptations Movie and began yelling "YOU UNGRATEFUL SONS OF BITCHES" at rejection emails. I got bitter. I began feeling the urge to reply to the individuals who told me that "my experience was impressive" but they found someone "whose experience more closely matched" doing exactly what I did at my old gig. I drove up to one place that famously had me waiting FOUR HOURS only to have the owner interview someone who came in later than I did and pass me on to the other admin assistant...and fought the urge to go in and ask for him. Oh yes, children..heffer was GUN hot. Then I r
Read more

The 8/23 De-Fat Post, aka-Obsessed (Not Bunny Boiling Nuts, Doe)

Image
Goal #2 is on its way to being reached.  As of now, I'm 36.4 pounds down since late April and that is by no means lightweight. I said "lightweight". N-E-Hoo...I'm having some serious head pains from a juice fast gone awry and it kind of made me low.  Combined with the irritation of my bitchfoot, and you have someone who is frustrated as hell.  I'm sure the pain isn't helping, but it really is there. I'm starting to get obsess-ed now.  All of these doctor visits involve scales, and everytime I see the number, I  get to calculating.  I was down four tenths of a pound in four days and I actually got pissed.  Chris reminded me that we had an unusual eating weekend with CJ's party, and I didn't juice that weekend either.  My nutritionist said that as long as the scale keeps going down, all is well.  She commended me on my continued success.  All the while...I was like "Tamara is Not Impressed". I thought about the last two months an
Read more