T.E.N Entertainment Gumbo 3/6/08

It's been a while since I darkened the verbal doorways with some amusing situations. The Memphis Crew knows that there was too much negativity goings on to be too bubbly, but I'm good now. Not much has popped off in the last few, but I'll telleth what I knoweth!

*Robert Downey, Jr. goes Black* Dude is going to play a black man in this movie called "Tropic Thunder". He already said it won't be Blackface or "Soul Man" Black, but convincing black. If he turns out to look like C. Thomas Howell did in that movie, I'm slapping three people. Either way, the movie stars Jack Black and Ben Stiller, so God only knows. Right now, it's testing good with real black people.




Power to the people.



*Bai Ling is a damn fool* This ass here got arrested for stealing two magazines and a pack of batteries. In case you're wondering who this odd broad is, she played in "My Baby's Daddy" and "She Hate Me". I think she mattered elsewhere too.




Jackass.



*Guess how much you get paid to babysit Britney Spears???* In the case of her father, Jamie Spears gets $2,500 a WEEK per a court order! $2,500 a week to watch his own damn kid!!! This sumbitch gets $10,000 a month to watch a 26 year old woman! I'll watch the bitch for half price!




A real courtroom photo!



*Gnarls Barkley gets banned* Actually, it isn't for anything bad. It's because their new video for "Run" failed this test that measures if it will cause epileptic seizures. Only Gnarls can make a negro pass the hell out in convulsions...

Damn I love them.





I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind!



*My boy gets a spinoff!* Cleveland Brown is getting a spinoff! Yesh, everyone's favorite animated token Rhode Islander gets a show! I don't know when for sure, but it's in the works!




I respect your candor...



*Introducing Harlow Winter Kate Madden* She's actually quite cute! If you look closely, you'll see clearly that Harlow has some of the black features that Nicole Richie has. Y'all did know she was black, right? I mean, even though she was adopted by Lionel and Brenda Richie, her father is (allegedly) an Afro-Latin man by the name of Pete Escovedo...as in brother to Sheila E. Either way, she denied it, but the chick damn sure ain't all white. I mean, her birth name is Nicole Camille Escovedo. Whatever the case, her baby is cute.




Aww....



*Heigl wants out* Reportedly, Kat Heigl wants to get killed off of "Grey's" so she can continue in her blossoming movie career. Let's be sensible here, chica...don't get all giddy because you got a husband and two good movies...DON'T YOU DENY US A GOOD FISTFIGHT BETWEEN YOU AND CALLIE ON THAT SHOW! I'm sorry. Got carried away.




Smoke yo'self!



*The Lohans get a show* It's called "Living Lohan". Something about Lindsay's mama being a mama and people watching.




*coughs*



*Pink & Carey are still friends* Word is that Pink and Carey Hart's divorce really is on good times. For some reason, nobody believes that but me. I mean, do they look like brooding and depressing people? No.




I liked them...



*A pic of Sabretooth* Here's an official on-set picture of Liev Schriber as Sabretooth in the new X-Men movie. I'm okay with it. I still want to get in a movie or something.




Gooooo Liev!!!



*Patrick Swayze got the cancer* The rumors about Patrick Swayze having pancreatic cancer are true. However, he doesn't really have five weeks left like the National Enquirer's lying asses said. He's responding to treatment, and with prayer he'll be aight.





Fight it Patrick! Nobody puts Pat in a corner!



*Kelly Rowland says she feels "complete"* She got a boob job last October. She's upgraded to a B cup. Bless her boobies.




Boob yo'self



*Guess what HER name is?*







Fifi Trixibelle Geldof!

When I found that out, I called in sick!

*Lisa Marie done swole a little* I know that this really doesn't count as news, but in this photo, she made me do my old mechanic imitation "Guhl, you look jus' like' yo goddamn daddy"!





Damn Scientologist.



*K-Fed done got Fed* I guess making all of that money in child support and such was spent on family dinters...They're starting to call ol' boy "Well-Fed"! Fat kids RULE...until you have a stroke.

I gotta tighten up, dammit.

BUT, I digress...





He be-a rotund-a!



And last, but damn sho' not least. Guess what I found online!!!!






Yesh! I have purchased the "I Love You Like You Are" CD by Ray Parker Jr. from eBay! Guess how much my winning bid was?

$0.50. $2.50 including shipping. I had the only damn bid.

*sings title track from "I Love You Like You Are"*

I'd like to dedicate this to Lisa Marie Presley and K-Fed:

"I couldn't help but overhear your conversation about losing weight
Why? Baby, you already look great to me
I don't care what your girlfriends say, take it from me
You don't need to lose five pounds
'Cuz I like it nice and round"

I love me some Ray Erskine Parker, Jr...WHOO!

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