Since Fokes Are "Cleaning House" Now...
Apparently, that's the phrase of the week! I'm going to use it for the next 24-48 hours! LMAO!
So good family and friends, I'd like to share my thoughts on a situation. It involves a situation that many of you are familiar with, and others have experienced in another capacity. I'm not going to put any names out because I'm going to exercise a moderate amount of discretion today.
Right now, I'm typing this with a cool, collected head and plenty of time to marinate. I have taken time to really think about the things that have bothered me because I wanted to make 100% certain that I made the right moves. At times, we tend to get angry about a situation, but not for the right reasons. As I look back over the last decade, I have seen instances where I got mad about the outcome of a situation. One in particular caused a rift in a very solid friendship for some time. Fortunately, I can say that time healed that wound, and we're still thick as thieves. In hindsight, I was upset about what went down, but because of my own selfish reasons. Thankfully, I didn't lose that companionship and I gained another friend in the process.
That is why I took time to contemplate this dilemma a little better. I had to ask myself "why are you mad about this damn fool's nonsense"?
I didn't answer.
I was still asleep.
When I woke up, I asked myself "what part of this mess has you so mad"?
I started watching "Golden Girls" and I didn't answer.
Finally, when I realized I could record the episode to my DVR, I asked my stubborn ass yet again "what has you so angry about this foolery"?
This note has the answers. Might be kind of convoluted, but they're answers nonetheless.
1. To give your 100% to a person you felt was like a brother to you and be ignored is a real effed up situation. When you have invested hours and hours into listening to the grief that he shared and all the stress you heard he dealt with, you are giving your 100%. You're being an ear, a shoulder, and a voice to someone who needed that. And when I say hours, I mean HOURS my dears and sirs.
Thank God for Cellular South...even if it doesn't work in that one corner of the crib.
2. I trusted this person with my hard earned possessions. When he was dealing with the "drama" that his ex allegedly put him through, he was without transportation, a phone and loot. All of those things are a great loss when you're trying to find a job. I allowed him to drive my car and crash at my crib because I had a land line. I let him perch on my laptop to look for a job and crash on my couch many days because the "drama" of his problems made it hard to go home. Damn, that is a LOT of trust in someone you're not in a relationship with. Helped him get a cell phone, and never asked for a quarter. All for Big Brother...
3. As the lies unravel, I feel like I don't really, REALLY know who that person was. Here's the killer...all of the lies told were completely unnecessary. No like, REALLY uncalled for. The question could be asked "why should anyone lie"? Well, there's that lie you tell when your friend with the third chin wants a Halle Berry haircut and you say "that's not...quite...you...how about a...bob"? That's somewhat excusable. But the lies that flew all over the place with this person was just too damn much! DUDE! YOU AIN'T GOTTA LIE TO KICK IT! Let me explain:
*waxes poetical*
In my group of friends, which includes virtually everyone tagged in this note and many more who couldn't fit, we are all in the process of getting ourselves right. I'm not going to speak for anyone but myself...but hell, I'm trying to get more income, a better car, a less hood crib, and none of my furniture matches! Hell, yall been over there! IT DOESN'T MATCH! Every room has a different mood! My mama said my dresser looks like an ancient organ! MY MAMA SAID THAT!
But I digress...
Nobody in our circle has to impress anyone. Well Christian has to do good with hair, but that's because she's a hair stylist and that's how you get business *waves at Christian* But none of us have to lie. All the stories of performances, talents...
...playing 112 instuments...
...having certain college education...
...being done so wrong by so many women...
...having a son in Texas that's 18 years old by a Puerto Rican woman who in turn lied about it...
None of that is called for. We're all friends in the circle, and we're just trying to have a good time. Just enjoying each other's company. Nobody judges anyone.
4. All that damn LYING!!! That was just reiterating a point.
5. The fact that the drama in his own life caused unnecessary mess in my circle. Hey fam! Remember the alleged phone calls he was getting from her when I moved to the Hellhole in February? Remember the trip to Nashville? What about his statement about being so done with his ex before he moved on to his current victim? Yeah, um, I'm finding out it was bullshiggity. Can't reveal my sources, but they've told me he wasn't done with the ex. Still isn't. My only issue: why lie and keep up all that mess? Hell, even my daddy still asks about him because of that.
In the end, I'm fine about it. I just wanted to make sure my reasons were valid. I don't care about the money I blew on food, gas and helping him. That's a loss. I wouldn't even make a fuss about it. I would like to ask why, but for what reason? A part of this growing up process involves taking an "L". I consider this to be said "L". I can say with a clear conscience that I did what I did for a friend, and don't get it twisted, he helped me out quite a bit too. No doubt about that. It's just unfortunate that his legacy will be full of lies and deceit.
So at any rate...who still hanging out Saturday?!? LMAO!
So good family and friends, I'd like to share my thoughts on a situation. It involves a situation that many of you are familiar with, and others have experienced in another capacity. I'm not going to put any names out because I'm going to exercise a moderate amount of discretion today.
Right now, I'm typing this with a cool, collected head and plenty of time to marinate. I have taken time to really think about the things that have bothered me because I wanted to make 100% certain that I made the right moves. At times, we tend to get angry about a situation, but not for the right reasons. As I look back over the last decade, I have seen instances where I got mad about the outcome of a situation. One in particular caused a rift in a very solid friendship for some time. Fortunately, I can say that time healed that wound, and we're still thick as thieves. In hindsight, I was upset about what went down, but because of my own selfish reasons. Thankfully, I didn't lose that companionship and I gained another friend in the process.
That is why I took time to contemplate this dilemma a little better. I had to ask myself "why are you mad about this damn fool's nonsense"?
I didn't answer.
I was still asleep.
When I woke up, I asked myself "what part of this mess has you so mad"?
I started watching "Golden Girls" and I didn't answer.
Finally, when I realized I could record the episode to my DVR, I asked my stubborn ass yet again "what has you so angry about this foolery"?
This note has the answers. Might be kind of convoluted, but they're answers nonetheless.
1. To give your 100% to a person you felt was like a brother to you and be ignored is a real effed up situation. When you have invested hours and hours into listening to the grief that he shared and all the stress you heard he dealt with, you are giving your 100%. You're being an ear, a shoulder, and a voice to someone who needed that. And when I say hours, I mean HOURS my dears and sirs.
Thank God for Cellular South...even if it doesn't work in that one corner of the crib.
2. I trusted this person with my hard earned possessions. When he was dealing with the "drama" that his ex allegedly put him through, he was without transportation, a phone and loot. All of those things are a great loss when you're trying to find a job. I allowed him to drive my car and crash at my crib because I had a land line. I let him perch on my laptop to look for a job and crash on my couch many days because the "drama" of his problems made it hard to go home. Damn, that is a LOT of trust in someone you're not in a relationship with. Helped him get a cell phone, and never asked for a quarter. All for Big Brother...
3. As the lies unravel, I feel like I don't really, REALLY know who that person was. Here's the killer...all of the lies told were completely unnecessary. No like, REALLY uncalled for. The question could be asked "why should anyone lie"? Well, there's that lie you tell when your friend with the third chin wants a Halle Berry haircut and you say "that's not...quite...you...how about a...bob"? That's somewhat excusable. But the lies that flew all over the place with this person was just too damn much! DUDE! YOU AIN'T GOTTA LIE TO KICK IT! Let me explain:
*waxes poetical*
In my group of friends, which includes virtually everyone tagged in this note and many more who couldn't fit, we are all in the process of getting ourselves right. I'm not going to speak for anyone but myself...but hell, I'm trying to get more income, a better car, a less hood crib, and none of my furniture matches! Hell, yall been over there! IT DOESN'T MATCH! Every room has a different mood! My mama said my dresser looks like an ancient organ! MY MAMA SAID THAT!
But I digress...
Nobody in our circle has to impress anyone. Well Christian has to do good with hair, but that's because she's a hair stylist and that's how you get business *waves at Christian* But none of us have to lie. All the stories of performances, talents...
...playing 112 instuments...
...having certain college education...
...being done so wrong by so many women...
...having a son in Texas that's 18 years old by a Puerto Rican woman who in turn lied about it...
None of that is called for. We're all friends in the circle, and we're just trying to have a good time. Just enjoying each other's company. Nobody judges anyone.
4. All that damn LYING!!! That was just reiterating a point.
5. The fact that the drama in his own life caused unnecessary mess in my circle. Hey fam! Remember the alleged phone calls he was getting from her when I moved to the Hellhole in February? Remember the trip to Nashville? What about his statement about being so done with his ex before he moved on to his current victim? Yeah, um, I'm finding out it was bullshiggity. Can't reveal my sources, but they've told me he wasn't done with the ex. Still isn't. My only issue: why lie and keep up all that mess? Hell, even my daddy still asks about him because of that.
In the end, I'm fine about it. I just wanted to make sure my reasons were valid. I don't care about the money I blew on food, gas and helping him. That's a loss. I wouldn't even make a fuss about it. I would like to ask why, but for what reason? A part of this growing up process involves taking an "L". I consider this to be said "L". I can say with a clear conscience that I did what I did for a friend, and don't get it twisted, he helped me out quite a bit too. No doubt about that. It's just unfortunate that his legacy will be full of lies and deceit.
So at any rate...who still hanging out Saturday?!? LMAO!
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